11:45 p.m. - 2001-11-01
Lazy
Laziest entry yet. I have so little to say tonight. This is like a full lunar eclipse, it happens so seldom; Heckafresh is shutting up for a while. And yes, this is about the full extent of my shut-up-ability. My mouth is like a faucet that is missing it's washer, you can only slow the flow down to a not so light drip.
Anyway, I've been cleaning up my e-mail account because I hope to wipe Windows 95 the fuck offa this crash-o-matic I like to call a 'puter. In my fall cleaning I discovered a few old e-mails from correspondence with my ex-room mate when he was on his trip to Israel two years ago. Why did I save e-mails from over two years ago? I'm lazy. I also saved well over five hundred porn spam's. (I'm only about three quarters through writing down all those addresses in my Palm Pilot. What a pain!) Anyway, now it will come in handy since I don't feel like writing a real update.
Have you ever enabled your present laziness via past laziness? Didn't think so.
>Heckafresh,
have you been getting my mail, what's the story? Let me know if you get this, e-diggity. I'm leaving for Greece on Fri.,and if this don't work, I'll call ya before I leave.By the way how was chris rock???? I forgot to ask you last time.
A-dog scrilla scratch
>Dear A-dog,
I'm hella jealous about you going to Greece you lucky bastard. But I get to go San Jose whenever I want so we're kinda even. Except I never want to go to San Jo.
As for Chris Rock, I will answer your inquiry only because you used four question marks. Chris Rocks show was laugh out loud funny! It was scorching comedy that had you begging for more! It was this years must see comedy show! Chris Rock "Rocks"!
As for girls, still no call from Coat Check Girl. I should have known from the beginning. I've met her type before, all they care about is coats. And I'm not a coat, A-dog I'm a man. Just a man.
I need to do something about this no pussy situation soon, before my penis up and leaves me. "I can do better on my own!" he'll shout over his shoulder as he slams the door behind him. I'll rush to the window to see him making his way down Ardendale Drive, all his belongings in a little bandana hanging from a stick. I'll want to shout for him to come back but in my heart I'll know he's right. I just hope he doesn't get run over, or eaten by a skunk.
Sergio called for you. I gave him your E-mail. He said Alice doesn't talk to Anyika anymore. Did I tell you I looked for her on the net and through 1-800-US-SEARCH? They couldn't find her , but at least it cost me forty bucks. Shit, I couldn't find her either and they refused to pay ME anything. Mother fuckers.
Well A-dog, that's the state side news. Write back before your trip(immediately even better).
My shoulders are huge,
Eli
By the way, Coat Check Girl never did call me, but I managed to convince the ol' genitalia to stick around a little while longer. Thank you porn spam!
