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2:02 a.m. - 2002-07-31
Well, maybe not me.
I don�t like nuthin�.

And Austin Powers part III was no exception. I can sum up the concept in five words; dress up the fucking midget.

There were parts that made me laugh for sure, but I refuse to like a movie that is sold as a comedy because it makes me laugh at roughly 25% of attempts. And for everybody in the theater who was rolling at the parts they show on the TV trailer that I know you have seen fifty thousand times already, fuck you and stop making more money than me.

To anyone who reads this that laughs at the parts of any movie that you have seen over and over again on TV, cut that shit out please.

The best part of the movie was the vanilla coke I had, and I smuggled that shit in. The second best part is this right here, hating it.

Since I don�t like nuthin� don�t take my word for it, go and get your enjoyment from it as I really am very bitter that I would never allow myself that same simple pleasure in life. My resistance to approving of mediocre attempts at movies when obviously more effort could have been expended to separate me from my ten bucks is not something I would wish on anyone else. In the ever-optimistic words of my friend Curtis, �at least it made me tired.�

So final analysis, if you are not a fucking cynical jerk, you may enjoy it, if you are and have a bad case of insomnia, it may cure you, if you are like me and can�t even bring yourself to smile at a movie that seems like it used two thirds of high school skit as a script, it sucks to be us, huh?

I didn�t see Doug E. Fresh at all, free of charge or otherwise. I don�t really care even a little bit to be honest. I also don�t care about Big Daddy Kane. Or anybody famous for that matter. I don�t see the allure of the celebrity. They are mostly just people who a lot of other people know of besides you. Some of them are smart, some of them are talented, some of them do nice things with all of the money they earn because they get way fucking over-paid for the services they provide and thus are able to, but for the most part they are just as fucked up as you.

And me of course.

Bah fucking shit.

 

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