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12:40 p.m. - 2003-04-08 Some people don�t change. You would do well to figure out who they are, stop expecting them to, or at least stop being surprised when they don�t. I learned that one the hard way. If you are with a gorilla, don�t be surprised when they grab for the banana, again, and again. You know that guy at work who talks shit about every acquaintance that you have in common? He talks shit about you too, stupid. You know that chick that has a list taller than she is of all the people who are to blame for her lack of happiness, but she is nowhere to be found on it? Don�t be shocked to find yourself on top of that list some day. A variable is something that you change in an equation that somehow changes results. In my history, one variable being subtracted and changing my life completely, well that proves the experiment. To many, they can look at the scheme of their lives and change the same variable with no result over and fucking over, always remaining the same, and still blame the motherfucking variable. These people are not very bright, but hey, who gives a fuck? Today I went to the office depot with ole Bean. The checkout guy hit on her, not realizing that I was with her. It was hilarious. It made me realize how easy it is to be secure with someone who you know is secure. For a while I thought that I had become the jealous type for life because of my last girlfriend�s insecure need for attention from men. The scene in the office depot would have made her whole day, where as ole bean has her day made by appreciating what we give each other. You just have to find someone who matches you in where they derive their self worth from, and shit becomes easy-peasy. It felt good to be able to laugh about her getting hit on. Like the olden, olden days, before I became insecure through an insecure relationship. Security is fucking nice. In other news, I have been scheming, in an illegal nature, to have my piece of shit truck stolen in order to collect the insurance moneys. Deplorable, I know. I had a bit of a moral dilemma with the idea, but I am one of those who can rationalize ripping off the corporations that rip me off. IRregardless, that is all over now. Know why? The house of one job I had last week was inhabited by the special investigator, (cop) who specializes in bringing cases regarding auto insurance fraud to the DA. The one. In my area. I don�t believe in god, but this is some sort of sign I guess. So I am fixing my truck instead, old purply rides again.
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