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5:27 p.m. - 2001-09-13
Hello. This is my first atempt to keep a real journal.

I didn't even know that online journals exisisted until about a year and a half ago when I met my girlfriend Jane.

She has kept a journal online for almost five years. I found out about it when we were laying in bed one morning at the dawn of our relationship. I nervously asked her if she had any secrets that she was worried about sharing with me, anything that might be important to let me know about before we started down the twisted trail of love in earnest. I, in all honesty, was not really so concerned with any posible future bombshells she could drop on me, as much as I was setting the table for a dish I felt I had better serve up myself. I figured the odds were about fifty-fifty that my little secret would be a deal breaker, but I felt I owed her the opportunity to make that decision before we spent too much more time together and she inevitably fell even deeper into starstruck, blissfull love with me.

"I keep an online journal."

I didn't know how to take it at first because I didn't know what it meant. When she explained it, I wasn't too concerned even though I thought it was a little strange, but hey, it was nothing compared to shock she was about to recieve. I knew that she was painting a picture of me in her mind, as I was her, and this news was akin to giving her a few gallons of paint. How would the portrait turn out? I wondered. To some people, people who were open to views other than those that society tries to shove down our throats freom birth, it might be no big deal--even endearing or exciting. but to others it could be a shameful sin, one that I should quite literally be locked up for. It would have to fall somewhere on that spectrum for Jane, the sheltered catholic school girl who I was growing very fond of very quickly, and I had no real indication as to where. But keeping it a secret was unfair, and difficult enough that it was becoming a threat to our relationship on it's own accord. She was going to find out sooner or later; sooner if our afair kept going the direction it was going. So I bit the bullet and told her. But my secret is not the point of this story so nevermind.

So that was my introduction to online journals. Jane actually set this one up for me as I am almost completely 'puter illiterate. I know that E-mail stands for "electronic-mail" and that your not supposed to spill water on 'em, but beyond that I'm in the dark. In fact I already managed to lose my first entry within five minutes. I think this will be a good experience for me. Jane has been encouraging me to write since we first met, partly because she thinks I have somthing to say, and partly so I stop trying to say it to HER every waking and semi-waking moment we spend together. I wrote a guest entry on her journal for our aniversary, so I'm not a complete virgin to jounals, more like a virgin who has given head. Well I'm ready to go all the way y'all. Stand-by.


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