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7:03 p.m. - 2001-12-15
And Bubbles' loss too, obviously.
I like my new job a lot better today than I did yesterday.

I didn't have to go to work today.

I also like this design that Janie made for me more and more every time I see it.

I do go back to work tomorrow, and I'll be working the wine bar. Wahoo! Blueberry tells me it is pretty chill back there.

Pssh…Blueberry.

I found out some very upsetting news recently. My weak-ass high school is not having a ten year reunion for my graduating class.

There goes another one of my dreams down the tubes.

For years I had been planing to show up dressed in a tux and tails ensemble complete with top hat, monocle, cane, cigar and accompanied by an obvious call girl in a red sequin dress who would preferably be a good six inches taller than me that I would call Bubbles. She would be instructed to fawn over me and back up any lies that I told with squeaky enthusiasm.

Example.

Heckafresh: "…and after founding the Atheist Save the Children Foundation I broke my first fifty million through my investments"

Innocent ex-classmate: "What did you invest in?"

Bubbles: "Pork bellieeees!!"

Heckafresh: "That's right hunny bunny…why don't you run along and fix daddy a gingerale at the refreshment table--you know just how just how I like it!"

Bubbles: "Okay wittle wover man…"
*scurries off in her high heels with a little squeal/giggle when I smack her ass*

Heckafresh: "Isn't she a doll? After my fourth divorce I thought I was through with the whole matrimony thing, but Bubbles just stole my heart. I knew we were meant for each other from the moment our eyes met that day she came to sweep the chimneys in my eleven story mansion…"

Oh well. Their loss.

 

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