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4:28 p.m. - 2006-01-18
Giving Bush a BJ only in Kenyaaaaaaa!
FUCK! I wish I had talent like some of these prodigies your hear tell of with their writing symphonies and what have you at a very early age. I think I reached another milestone in my life, one that makes me even more of a man minus the young prefix. I am not jealous of the little shits anymore. When I used to read or get told about some freak of nature violin or effin obo-pianist who was near my age it would piss me off more than anything. Yes. They are better than me. Please remind me that I’m just as dumb as most of the population even if I think I’m smarter.

Now? I think those little suckers are cute as hell with their head all cocked side-ways and their mini bow flying so fast the resin is hitting the front row of the audience. “Good for them!” I think, “that’s just about the most darling thing I’ve ever seen in my whole god damned life.”

The use of the word “darling” is an exaggeration, but I’m still old.

But back to my original point, I wish I could compose me up some Mozart type ditties right inside my head sometimes. Like after I visited this site and need to blast out the song that is now looping in my head. Don’t get me wrong, I love the song, but I imagine my situation is similar to those women who have a rare disorder and are in a constant state of orgasm. Contrary to what we work our ass off to get a moment of an orgasm folks think, they claim they are miserable. I want this song to be the soundtrack to my day, but if it keeps up at this frequency I’m really worried about how it will affect my ability to reach the afore mentioned moment. It’s not no D’Angelo, although I guess the beat is hump alongable.

Also, please, for the love of god will some woman give Bush a hummer in the oval office? It’s the only way we will be able to get rid of the fucker. I have to tell you, in all honesty, if I really could get him out of the Whitehouse by giving him a blowjob myself I might take the bullet for the good of the world. As long as he promised not to push my head down of course.

This whole line of thinking makes me wonder how many people who are for the war would have made the same deal with old Saddam? He gets removed from office, the new democracy is allowed to start without interference, and Christ you even get an i-pod for yourself tossed in as a bonus. Would they agree to give Saddam head—to climax mind you—on Al Jazeera? This is post spider-hole clean up of course, and there will be no statues commemorating the act in the public square unless you want one. You’d be a hero, man!

Also, as long as I’m being completely insensitive to serious subjects, can you imagine if Jesus really does return to earth how many groupies that guy will have?


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