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11:41 p.m. - 2002-01-05
If it ever starts working the opposite way I'll never be able to go to Red Lobster again.
I am happy about two things in particular tonight.

One is that when I went to the beach this morning (afternoon to all you people who rise before 1PM), I saw something laying on the beach that looked most curious from the short distance from which I stood. It appeared to be the remains some sort of odd shaped deceased sea creature, maybe a crab or jelly fish.

Upon closer scrutiny it revealed itself to be a tampon.

Why am I glad for this you may ask. Janie once explained to me the concept of "top down" thinking. It is the part of our psychology that fills in various blanks and completes pictures that are incomplete.

For example, if a word is misspelled on a sign we will still gain it's meaning by taking it in context. As unique a selling point as it would be, the hotel sign that my parents saw all those years ago was not bragging of offering a heated poo to their guests, but obviously a heated pool.

So I am grateful to still be uncorrupted enough to have had my top down thinking fill in the "what the hell is that thing?" blank with a crustacean or jellyfish before reaching the correct, more disgustingly objectionable conclusion.

Secondly, I am overjoyed that said tampon was unused.


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