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2:02 p.m. - 2002-01-20

This will teach everyone who believed me to…um…believe me.

I am a liar! I never stick to resolutions! I will wait until four months into a relationship and then threaten to take away my love just to prove to everyone how important I am.

Or else I just thunk of something to write about already.

While in the store across the street from my house, I noticed this hanging on the candy rack.

Now, maybe it's just because seeing Requiem for a Dream got me obsessed with heroin, but don't those spoons look just a little like smack doses ready for the needle?

But a candy company would never do something like that. It must just be some old school traditional candy or something. They even outlawed Pop-Eye cigarettes so little kids wouldn't get the idea that smoking was cool from their candy and would have to wait until they were old enough to figure it out themselves, so candy smack? Must be my own warped, fucked up top down thinking.

Then I saw this.


They provide the needles too. Get yourself a Red Rope licorice to tie off your arm and you're practically a rock star!

That got me to thinking.

Pixie stix=Angle Dust
Pop Rocks=Crack Rocks
Jello=Jello shots

Candy is corrupting the youth and ripening them for drug and alcohol abuse! I have to do something about this. There are thousands of kids out there just waiting to be turned on to the hard stuff by some opportunistic, moraless drug pusher, and here I am only selling my crank to truckers and college students.


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