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12:31 a.m. - 2002-06-16
The motherfuckin Monkees, yo!
I saw The Monkees live in concert tonight. Yes, the The Monkees. It was a wonderful and mind numbing experience. It afforded me the opportunity to meet my fourth Dlander, dharmabumgrl and her boyfriend. They were very nice, and gave Rach and me a free ticket each!

The body count still remains at zero.

The opening act was Greg Brady, Johnny Bravo himself, he even wore the Johnny Bravo jacket, just to prove he could. He rapped. He rapped a parody of eminems The Real Slim Shady that was of course called The Real Greg Brady. It was so embarrassingly good. He recommended that all of the phony Greg Bradys kiss him where there is no sunshine day. He said he came up with the idea while he was downing forties. Horrific and the highlight of my year to date.

Then The Monkees came out. I will go through the pros and cons of this directly.

Pro. They are the motherfuckin Monkees.
Con. Only Davy and Mickey were present.
Pro. One of The Monkees was wearing leather pants!
Con. Because they actually think they are rock stars and people came to hear them sing due to their copious musical talent.
Pro. There are three songs of theirs that I would have been happy to hear.
Con. They made the crowd sit through about ten songs that were not recognizable before they would sing We Are The motherfuckin Monkees or Im a motherfuckin Believer, a task that I just wasnt up to.
Pro. I did stay long enough to hear Davy Jones croon Girl, the song he sang to Marcia Brady before he made her give up on hygiene with a pedophilic smooch on her cheek.
Con. It was really annoying disintegrating over and over as part of the rest of the crowd which melted away as he looked the fifty year old groupies in the face one at a time and they each imagined that he was singing it just to them.
Pro. I can say Ive seen The Monkees live.
Con. I am beginning to realize that I may be the only one who would be impressed by that, and I already know.

Still, I am a Monkees fan because Davy Jones is shorter than me.

 

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